Look, I know Rihanna is sexy. Esquire didn’t name her the Sexiest Woman Alive for 2011 for no good reason. But *why* is she considered sexy? Its it because she is good looking? Take a look at that pic. Is that hot? Is she pretty?

Or below. Ok, the hair is kinda interesting. But that face ain’t gonna launch a thousand ships.

But there is something interesting in that picture. See that necklace she is wearing? Why don’t we blow that up and take a look.

You know its bad if CWM has to cover it up. Rihanna is sexy because….. she likes SEX. And it appears she likes it every which way she can get it. And most importantly she is quite public about it. I offer for your enjoyment some pictures from the August 2011 Kadooment Day celebration in Barbados.

RANDOM DUDE: Hello, I am very big fan of your music.

RIHANNA: Why thank you. Wanna pretend to do me in the butt?

RANDOM DUDE: You are too kind.

Ok, so what have we learned here today? First, Rihanna isn’t really all that pretty. Cute, but you probably see better every day. Rihanna IS sexy. Very sexy. And why? She certainly has a nice figure. Still if you go to a nice beach on a hot summer day there is a good chance you’ll see someone hotter. No, what is sexy about Rihanna is that brain of hers. So the next time your significant other sees you ogling Rihanna on TV or in a magazine be sure to tell her “Honey, I only like her for her brain”.